It has been said that suffering is having what you do not want (singleness), and wanting what you do not have (a husband)

Longing for what you do not have is a universal condition. It is not limited to singles. It is true that the longing for a husband can be satisfied on your wedding day, but that longing is soon replaced by desires and expectations about the marriage relationship that may not be satisfied in a thousand lifetimes. If you are presently discontent as a single woman, you can count on being dissatisfied as a married woman in the future.

If you are discontent as a single woman, you will be dissatisfied as a married woman.
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The mystery of contentment often seems to escape the understanding of the single woman. She assumes that her circumstances justify her condition and give her permission to remain dissatisfied with her life assignment. Not having learned how to lay down the terrible burden of always wanting life to be on her terms, she continues to struggle with the torture of her desires. The restlessness caused by her desire for what she does not have makes waiting seem an impossible task. In fact, to the discontented woman, the word wait probably compares to a cuss word in her mind. A Lady in Waiting finds her capacity to wait for God’s best to be rooted in contentment.

A Lady in Waiting finds her capacity to wait for God’s best to be rooted in contentment.
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If you would like more information on this topic you can read a free preview of my new book The New Lady in Waiting here: Free Preview or get it here Buy The New Lady in Waiting.

Have a question or comment? Let me know on Twitter or Facebook.

How does physical intimacy ruin a good relationship?

When I first became a Christian, and had newly left behind a sex-saturated dating mentality, I started dating this wonderful Christian guy. His commitment to moral purity touched my heart profoundly. After dating for a year, this young man’s moral purity was challenged by a young woman—me!

I had assumed the inevitability of moving toward the sexual brink, especially since we were talking about a future life together. I only understood a dating world where sexual sin was actually one of the requirements. When this godly young man broke up with me, I was absolutely devastated. After recovering from the shock, the Lord very kindly brought to my mind a night when this young man and I went too far. We went to the No Zone for a moment—but the moment ended our relationship!

Spiritual passion makes it difficult to see that God also set physical limits to protect you...
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Hebrews 13:4 (NIV) very clearly says that “Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral.” God judges the sin of immorality. It feels awful to be separated from your Lord by the guilt of sin.

Actions speak louder than words, and this is especially true regarding premarital sex.

It is difficult to share Christ with one who knows your reputation. Your actions can also cause weaker brothers and sisters to stumble. One night of passion can totally destroy a reputation you have built over a lifetime.

It is difficult to share Christ with one who knows your reputation.
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The spiritual side of sex is often overlooked. Even many Christians are not aware of the profoundly spiritual nature of their sex lives. A person will feel acute spiritual pain and separation from God when engaging in sex outside of marriage, but may not even realize how spiritually beneficial and unifying sex is within marriage.

God does not intend to deny you pleasure. He protects you so you might enjoy physical health, emotional stability, relational intimacy, and spiritual blessings. If you marry, He wants you to grow more in love with your husband with each passing year. He wants you to live in complete trust of one another and spend a lifetime in love instead of the consequences of a fleeting night of uncontrolled lust.

If you would like more information on this topic you can read a free preview of my new book The New Lady in Waiting here: Free Preview or get it here Buy The New Lady in Waiting.

Have a question or comment? Let me know on Twitter or Facebook.

Think of it this way.

Mr. Right comes over one day and begins to speak of his devotion to you. He says what you have been waiting to hear: “I love you. I give you my heart completely. For 364 days of every year, I will devote myself to you and you only.” But then he adds, “However, one day each year I want to date others and see what I have missed. Don’t worry; you can have all the rest. Will you marry me?”

What would your response be? Would you want this kind of devotion? Would it be selfish of you to deny him his heart just one day a year to give to others? No! Absolutely not. You would want his total love and devotion.

You would want his heart all 365 days a year.
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Similarly, giving Christ your heart means you are not free to give it away to other things or people that come into your life (in idolatry). You can’t give a part to relationships that delight you in this world and still seek God with a whole heart.

You cannot keep part of your heart for something that may seem better if it comes along. Devotion to the Lord Jesus Christ is giving everything or nothing at all. Your devotion to Christ must be a serious commitment to His Lordship.

You can’t give part of your heart to this world & still seek God with a whole heart.
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Christ loves you and is completely committed to you. Wholeheartedly devote yourself to loving and enjoying Him in return, 365 days a year.

If you would like more information on this topic you can read a free preview of my new book The New Lady in Waiting here: Free Preview or get it here Buy The New Lady in Waiting.

Have a question or comment? Let me know on Twitter or Facebook.

Why do women tend to “go after the guys”?

“Insecurity among women is epidemic, but it is not incurable. Don’t expect it to go away quietly, however. We’re going to have to let truth scream louder to our souls than the lies that have infected us,” says Beth Moore, and I agree.

The father of lies (see John 8:44) screams lies at our hearts daily. We can only scream back if our hearts are wallpapered with the truth (see John 8:32). We, as well as our girls, need to learn how to scream at the liar! It may seem a contradiction of a Lady in Waiting to be screaming, but there are times when we need to.

Truth #1— Do Not Label Yourself Negatively

Self-condemnation leaves no room for loving others.
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If you’re hard on yourself, you’re hard on others.

…Love your neighbor as yourself (Matthew 22:39).

Truth #2—Behave Assertively, With God-Confidence

God-confidence is the opposite of arrogance and pride.

For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love
and of self-discipline (2 Timothy 1:7 NIV).

Truth #3—When You Fail, Confess and Refuse to Condemn Yourself

If you fail, it only means you still have a pulse.

If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins…(1 John 1:9 NIV).

There is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus (Romans 8:1 NIV).

Truth #4—Do Not Compare Yourself with Others

Comparisons are demoralizing.

You are unique, one of a kind; therefore you are incomparable.

…When they measure themselves by themselves and compare themselves with themselves, they are not wise (2 Corinthians 10:12 NIV).

Truth #5—Concentrate on God’s Grace

A definition of grace: for one to bow down in order to benefit another/others greatly.

Grace is strength allotted to me to behave myself.

How great is the love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are! (1 John 3:1 NIV).

Truth #6—Associate with Positive People

As we associate, we become.

Your closest friend is a mirror of the future you!
He who walks with the wise grows wise… (Proverbs 13:20 NIV).

Truth #7—Learn How to Rejoice in All Things

The key facet of emotional health is the ability to be thankful and grateful.
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Give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus (1 Thessalonians 5:18 NIV).

Truth #8—Have Realistic Expectations of Yourself and Others

Remember, on your best day…you are still “but dust” (see Ps. 103:13-14).

The source of so much grief: unrealistic expectations (see Ps. 39:7).

Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment… (Romans 12:3 NIV).

Truth #9—Growth and Change Are a Process and Are Never Instantaneous

God is the Agent of Change (see John 17:17).

The start is the promise of the finish (see Phil. 1:6; 1 Thess. 5:24).
In God’s corrections, He never stops believing in us!

For whom the Lord loves He reproves, even as a father, the son in whom he delights (Proverbs 3:12).

Truth #10—Do What Is Right and Pleasing to Jesus

Pleasing Jesus is not the same as pleasing people (see Matt. 6:1).

How do you discern the difference between people pleasing and “Papa pleasing?” (See Hebrews 4:12-13.)

If I were still trying to please men, I would not be a servant of Christ (Galatians 1:10 NIV).

Truth #11—Be Positive

Consider fasting from critical remarks.

See how long you can go without saying something negative.

Pray for a mouth filter:

Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things (Philippians 4:8 NIV).

Turn to your heavenly Father now. Pour out to Him your heart’s longing to be loved. See His arms open wide and His empty lap ready to embrace and hold you near. He considers you dear. He longs to give you satisfying love. Perhaps He does desire to give you a man to love also.

But the man you marry cannot meet your need for security. Only God’s love brings security.
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If you would like more information on this topic you can read a free preview of my new book The New Lady in Waiting here: Free Preview or get it here Buy The New Lady in Waiting.

Have a question or comment? Let me know on Twitter or Facebook.

Each one of us have unresolved thoughts, feelings, and impulses that seem to come right out of the blue at all the wrong times. But through healing prayer, we are learning about letting God take these unresolved issues—these things that are hidden in the depths of our hearts and are springing up, causing ungodly thoughts, emotional outbursts of different types, and impulsive and destructive behaviors—and healing them. They are toxic expressions lying just under the surface of our hearts.

So even though we may be enjoying a peaceful union and communion with God in our lives, none of us have arrived yet, and we all have areas in our heart that conflict with enjoying the progressive intimate relationship we have with Christ. As we experience emotional healing, walking in the Spirit becomes less and less hindered by these intruders. We must learn to intentionally welcome God’s presence so we move beyond just enjoying His presence in a place of a peace to diligently pursuing Him for deep healing.

We long for Him to search out the hidden things deep within us.

The most effective way to diligently pursue God is not by telling Him we only want to enjoy intimacy with Him, but also by letting Him know we want Him to search our hearts. We long for Him to search out the hidden things deep with us, the affected areas, the emotional abuse, that is buried alive under the surface of our hearts. And when He reveals what needs healing, then we’re going to deal with whatever He exposes according to His process.

That’s the diligent pursuit I’m talking about, because we all want these issues resolved in our life. These toxic expressions periodically paralyze us, periodically cost us in relationships and in many of the endeavors of our life. The Lord taught me how to instantly deal with issues such as these and get my peace back. Therefore, we need to passionately pursue this season of emotional healing, this area of intentional sanctification.

Search me, O God.

The psalmist prayed, “Search me, O God, and know my heart; try me, and know my anxieties; and see if there is any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting” (Ps. 139:23-24). It’s not just about thinking this in our minds, but it’s about allowing God to search our hearts through prayer. He is able to go right to the core of some of these barriers, the heart of the things that have hindered us, the issues that rise up and resurrect themselves, causing us trouble, and He is able to bring deep healing.

We’re deliberately asking God to deal with these issues before they come up without notice. We are asking Him in advance to reveal the hidden areas of our hearts, allowing us to dismantle and abolish their effect in our lives. He longs for us to be free from the influence of these negative thoughts, impulses, and emotions. And we want to be those who respond rather than react—that’s the goal of maturing in the things of God.

If you’re interested in learning more about this topic, you can read a free preview of our book Deep Relief Now! here: Free Preview or get the book on Amazon here: Buy on Amazon

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And behold, there was a certain man before
Him who had dropsy. …And He…healed
him, and let him go. —Luke 14:2,4

Dropsy—fluid retention, swelling, edema, and swollen ankles—is the result of a toxic liver. Increasing protein consumption can also relieve the body of extra fluid.

TODAY’S TIP: Avoid white potatoes, which are a nightshade vegetable and may create water retention. Parsley is an excellent kidney purifying herb.

Get Dr. Bob’s Guide to Optimal Health at your favorite Retailer Below:

Amazon  •  Barnes & Noble  •  ChristianBook.com  •  Books-A-Million
Family Christian Stores  •  Lifeway  •  Mardel  •  Parable Stores

And Lot lifted his eyes and saw all
the plain of Jordan, that it was well
watered everywhere…like the garden
of the Lord…. —Genesis 13:10

TODAY’S TIP: The Dead Sea contains minerals that can purify and detox your system. Apply Dead Sea mud and clay masks to cleanse your skin of toxins and acne. Alternatively, soak your feet in Epsom salt water to stimulate detoxification.

Get Dr. Bob’s Guide to Optimal Health at your favorite Retailer Below:

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Family Christian Stores  •  Lifeway  •  Mardel  •  Parable Stores

…Because the creation itself also will be
delivered from the bondage of corruption
in the glorious liberty of the children of
God. For we know that the whole creation
groans and labors with birth pangs
together until now. —Romans 8:21-22

We live in a polluted world and creation groans for the return of Jesus so it can be delivered from corruption.

TODAY’S TIP: Be kind to your liver and drink water from a pure source to cleanse your liver and cleanse your system. Minimize the direct toxins you put into your body.

Get Dr. Bob’s Guide to Optimal Health at your favorite Retailer Below:

Amazon  •  Barnes & Noble  •  ChristianBook.com  •  Books-A-Million
Family Christian Stores  •  Lifeway  •  Mardel  •  Parable Stores

Again, departing from the region of
Tyre and Sidon, He came through the
midst of the region of Decapolis to
the Sea of Galilee. —Mark 7:31

Walking by a saltwater sea or a fresh body of water is beneficial for body cleansing. Ocean waves can create a negative ion charge. This promotes health and healing. The negative ions pull unwanted toxins from the body via the lymphatic system and literally charge you up. Your body absorbs minerals from the ocean.

TODAY’S TIP: Take a home mineral bath with Epsom salts to promote health.

Get Dr. Bob’s Guide to Optimal Health at your favorite Retailer Below:

Amazon  •  Barnes & Noble  •  ChristianBook.com  •  Books-A-Million
Family Christian Stores  •  Lifeway  •  Mardel  •  Parable Stores

Look at the birds of the air, for they neither
sow nor reap nor gather into barns; yet your
heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of
more value than they? —Matthew 6:26

TODAY’S TIP: Keep your diet simple and pure. Eat foods that decay and spoil—foods that need to be consumed in a few days. Avoid processed foods. Start your day with one half of a red apple with two teaspoons of organic almond butter, a poached egg, or quinoa. Avoid gluten-based grains like rye, wheat, oats, and barley, as they may be creating health challenges.

Get Dr. Bob’s Guide to Optimal Health at your favorite Retailer Below:

Amazon  •  Barnes & Noble  •  ChristianBook.com  •  Books-A-Million
Family Christian Stores  •  Lifeway  •  Mardel  •  Parable Stores