As I write this, I am reminded that at my present age Ernest Hemingway had already taken his own life. One further testimony to the fact that life is sometimes a wilderness, and it spares no one, not even the famous or wealthy. As matter of fact, I believe there are only three possible locations you can be in regarding the wilderness. You are either coming out, going in, or are there right now! And it is by design that you are where you are. God will use the time before your wilderness to prepare you, the time after a wilderness to use you, and the time in the wilderness to comfort and sit with you.
God Uses Wildernesses
Wildernesses are not wasted by God. He even made His own Son face the harshest wilderness ever recorded. The wilderness Jesus faced not only included the harsh desert heat, and the fierce nighttime cold, but it also included a face-to-face battle with the adversary of God and man, Satan himself. If Jesus was to save the world, He had to beat the devil first. And that He did, in spectacular fashion!
It has been said that “Life is what you live between crisis.” That seems especially true when blue skies turn dark and the winter cold approaches. The foreboding of the wilderness calls for the raw nerve endings to react, and it doesn’t take long to dive into a very dismal state of mind. In my wilderness experiences, I have realized that the question, “Why, God?” haunts me throughout the journey, from beginning to end. Looking at it from a human standpoint, since Jesus faced the wilderness for us, why do we also have to face it? Sounds logical, doesn’t it? Well, frankly, I don’t believe that Jesus faced the wilderness for you or me in the same fashion that He faced the cross. He had to go through the wilderness to learn obedience as a son. In like fashion, we have to do the same learning.
Learning in the Wilderness
Let me illustrate the point by telling you of a short, but potent, wilderness experience I once had. When I had traveled to Canada to be interviewed on a television station, I was graciously allowed to stay in a very nice apartment adjacent to the studio where the taping was done. The people who had picked me up from the airport dropped me off with a warning as they handed me the keys. “The set of double doors here are made of steel. If you go out, you must take the keys to get back in.” I smiled and put the keys down on the kitchen countertop. I remember thinking, Where am I going to go? It is 5 below zero outside, it’s nighttime, and I don’t have any transportation, not to mention that I have no idea where I am!
About an hour passed and the rumbling in my stomach reminded me that I had not eaten dinner. I searched for food in the refrigerator, but it was empty. Going through the cabinet, I found a phone book and looked up a Chinese take-out restaurant. When the delivery person knocked, I answered the door in a thin shirt and pants. As I handed the driver the money, I heard a loud slam from the second set of doors behind me. As a reflex, I immediately grabbed at my pocket for the keys, remembering the warning. My pocket was as flat as a pancake. My mind refused to believe that I was locked out, with only myself to blame. The driver sped off and was long gone. I grabbed at my cell phone in the other pocket. No signal in Canada. I ran outside and looked to see if there was anybody even remotely within shouting distance that I could appeal to, without success.
A Miracle in the Wilderness
It appeared I was far from any help. I told myself that I would probably die unless God did a miracle. As I took one more look outside, I saw in the distance a small light, which I convinced myself was worth running to. I think I did more skating on the ice than running, but I finally made it to a house with a diamond-shaped window on the front door from which the light emanated. As I looked in the window, I saw an elderly, frail man sitting on a couch holding a cane. He didn’t even look up when I knocked, so I knocked harder. Finally, he glanced up at the stranger knocking on the window and saw me make the gesture of holding a phone to my ear. He motioned for me to come around the side of the house as he struggled to rise from the couch.
When I opened the side door, I noticed the man at the top of a flight of stairs with a broken railing. He was wearing two different slippers and could barely stand erect, even with his cane. I explained my situation, and he invited me in to use the phone. I introduced myself, and he said his name was Bill. Clearly, Bill was going through a prolonged, harsh wilderness experience of his own. He said he knew of the Christian television station and that he watched it at times. I felt to ask about his obvious frail condition and he told me his story. He had just lived through the loss of his wife and spent nearly a year in the hospital himself. He had a condition where he could not eat most foods and had no children to help him. He was totally alone and waiting to die. I asked him if I could pray for him, and he gladly accepted. When I placed my hand on his back, I wondered when the last time was that he had felt any human contact. I promised Bill that I would talk to the television station to see if they would help him, and the next day I made good on that promise. We said goodbye as the local police came and picked me up to arrange getting me back in the studio.
Back in the warm apartment, I asked the Lord why He chose to let me get locked out in such a condition. I asked why He wouldn’t just tell me to go there without being locked out. He gently answered me in that still small voice, “Because you wouldn’t have gone.” Through that experience I have come to listen closer to the voice and leading of God. Whether long or short, that’s what the wilderness is designed to do.
About Ron Dicianni
